Trying something new thanks to WordPress. I see that there is a weekly photography challenge. Luckily, I was just able to get my camera out of pawn.
There is my brutal honesty and no shame showing up again.
My husband and I are still trying to work our way out of the money pit. I’m sure we aren’t alone in this.
My camera and I have a love hate relationship. Actually the camera isn’t at fault, I am. I love taking pictures, I always have. My husband bought me a good camera in 2012. I was so excited and took classes and practiced all the time. Others saw something in them as well because eventually it was a way to make money. I took family pictures, baby pictures and wedding pictures. A funny thing can happen when you start making money doing what you love. You can learn to hate it. You can feel the judgement each time a family sees their pictures. I learned so much about photography, but I could never get what I wanted on the screen. Either they weren’t sharp enough or I couldn’t edit it right. The more I learned, the more flaws I saw.
I quit. People would ask me to take their pictures and I would lie. The camera bag just sat there, and I would cringe when I passed by it. The few times I did try to shoot, my hands shook so bad, it would immediately go back in the bag.
Once it was pawned, I missed it like crazy, and today I saw the photo challenge. So I did two things I never do. I went out by myself, on a hunt for something that means local, to me. The second thing I did was forced myself to shoot everything in manual. I’ve always shot in AV mode, because I felt comfortable there. Comfortable is for fearful people, and I’m not that anymore.
My local, is a park in my hometown. On any weekend, you can drive through here and find 30 photographers chasing a family trying to get the best shot. I’ve taken hundreds of pictures here. But today, I shot just the park.
I’m so proud of myself for getting out. I’m so proud of myself for picking it back up. I’m so proud of myself for not expecting perfection, and just being grateful for what I captured. I’m grateful for finding this little challenge on this blog site. I’m grateful for feeling like it was okay for me to walk around this park, and just shoot what I want. And I’m extremely grateful my hands didn’t shake.